As soon as I finished the final draft of my first memoir, I discovered this invaluable artifact from high school:

High School Journal Entry

It’s a journal entry from my Sophomore English class at Scarborough High. It’s a harrowing read – check it out:

FEBRUARY 26, 1990

This weekend was pretty exciting.

I found out I’m not an American citizen! HA! Do you believe that?! See, I was born in Stuttgart, W. Germany in an army hospital. But, to my mom’s disnotification, that doesn’t make the child an American citizen. So, when she came back to the States with me, she (according to US Immigration) was smuggling me across the border! Since I did not have a passport or a greencard, I’m not a US citizen. I am, however, property of the German government! So, if I don’t do something about this, Immigration will deport me back to Germany!

Something else pretty weird happened. My mom almost was killed. My stepfather is now charged with aggravated assault. HA! Good, I hate his ass. He also has three warrants for his arrest! And the police came this morning to arrest him! But of course, he wasn’t there. My mom now has a protective order to keep him away. It’s a long story, and in three minutes I can’t get it all in! I’ve told the story 3,000,000 times! Boy, life sure is neat! Especially mine! I can’t wait to write a book.

When I tell people stories about my life, I’m usually met with odd looks. Most people think I’m full of it. It took my best friend Ethan six years to realize all my stories were true. It’s because I dug up some old photos and showed him proof. 

Until yesterday, I haven’t seen this thing in thirty years. I found a whole pile of notebooks containing journal entries (both personal and for school), stories, and academic papers from throughout the entire period in the memoir – the years 1987-1991. This and other entries will certainly be sprinkled throughout the manuscript.

Stick around – this gets more interesting,


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